"The texter"

Something else that I have observed as of late is that EVERY person I date decides to instead of pick up the phone, they text, text, text. Now, yes I am very guilty of this, and I do have conversations with people through text, but literally half the people I have talked to have asked me out over text? Asked me personal questions over text. Now I am going to sound like an 80 year old, but what happened to the days of picking up the phone, being a man and asking someone out? I can understand text messages here and there, but getting to "know" someone through text is just weird to me. In addition, every single day this week I have been woken up before my alarm goes off with Good morning texts at 7:15am. Those of you that KNOW me well know that I don't function before 10:00. Well, guess what guys if you disturb my sleep one more time it will not be a good morning for you. :) The main "texter" I am speaking of I can't blog about my date, because he didn't even make it to a date. I was actually going to go because I thought it would be a worth-while story, but he just became psycho and decided to just let this one go. (thanks for the advice, Amy) Here is a brief transcript of our texts for your reading pleasure:

P:I can't believe you're 5'2
me: um that was how I was born...
P: no it's nice
P: I really do like short women
P: Do you have small hands
Me: LOLOL really?!?
P: What?
P: ok....nevermind
P: do you like to wear flip flops?
P: your nails painted?
Me: yes, Off to bed for me.

Next Day: (We're meeting at the Blue Goose)
Me: I am thinking 7-ish
P: Bring your swim suit!
Me:To the Blue Goose???
P: No silly if you want to go swimming
Me: let's just stick to drinks.
P: OK.

Today - which ended the date

Me: I can go... but I want to be home no later than 10:00
P: cap me off...lol
P: Just be honest
Me: about what?
P: I dated a compulsive liar for 3 months. Its a screwed up story.
Me: What does that have to do with me? Why do you not think that's an honest statement?
P: fine
P: no!!! I will explain later
Me: I think you may have baggage from her and I don't want to be blamed for someone else's actions and feel we shouldn't text anymore.
P: Whatever
P:Think what you want
P: I don't really think that it is nice to judge someone by a comment her or she said but your going to do that I don't want want anything to do with you anyway.

So ladies, there it is. My non-date date story. On to the next!!

The "Ginger"

On this "go-around" of dating I have decided to give ALL types (looks wise) a chance. Besides Michael, I have always gone for the baby-faced all american looking guy. It's fair to give anyone a chance at least once. After all, I'm just meeting a "friend" for a friendly drink or a dinner that they'll most likely pay for anyway right? What's there really to lose except some precious time out of my day. So... I decided to meet "Ginger" (he has red hair for those of you that don't know) out for drinks during the week. Drinks on a week night - you would think it would be pretty harmless, right. So...we meet at the flying saucer in Fort Worth. I show up about twenty minutes before he does and grab a beer, so that's OK but as he pulls up in his ORANGE charger with a black racing stripe he starts complaining and says, "if I have to pay for parking when the lot is full I am gonna be pissed." This was my first inclination that my night might not go so well. Well since there was no parking, we decided to go to a Mexican restaurant that was recommended by a "friend" i had just met at the bar. It was decent food, but I must say the waiter was more interesting than my date. He goes country dancing on the weekends and wears boots so I asked him if he ever wears a cowboy hat too. He says, "well the ladies I have dated in the past have always said my hair was much too pretty to cover up" Wow. So he started bragging about how much money he made, how he loves his job, how he was a high school "star" with numerous awards (although it happened 17 years ago) As we're looking at the menu he says, "so do you want your own thing - or do you want to split something. How hungry are you?" Really? So of course I said we could split something. We talk about more boring things - all about himself and how wonderful he is while asking no questions about me at all. (asshole) Then the bill comes(I truly hate this part of the date) He stares at it awkwardly and so I say, "would you like for me to pay for half?" He says, "up to you..." Of course I did then, put the whole meal on my credit card and he proceeds to give me cash. At this point I was fuming. We SPLIT a meal, and he couldn't even pick up the bill while he was bragging about how much money he made. UGH! So finally we leave the restaurant and I tell him I can find my way to my car myself. I stick out my hand for a handshake. And he said, "That's all I get?" Yes, buddy that's all you get. He said he would like to see me again. Well, of course he would he gets to talk about himself the whole time and doesn't have to pay for a full meal. Hmmm.. I wonder why he is still single.

Let's start at the very beginning

30 and single. That was something as a 14 year old I thought was designated for ladies with seven cats, who sat and knitted by themselves in the dark, who were socially awkward and weird. (and maybe a little unfortunate looking) Well, the status 30 and single would be me now except I don't really like cats, I can't knit, I think I have pretty strong interpersonal skills, but maybe I can be a little quirky at times. (not weird, just quirky) I have had my fair share of dating "interesting" men over the years, and that is putting it very politely. I decided mainly to start this blog because a lot of my friends like to hear how my dates go, and sometimes we can't catch up during the week or if its a really bad date, I really don't feel like reliving it over and over. I also thought it would be interesting to look back on all the good, bad, and ugly of the dating scene. Most of my friends now have to live vicariously through me anyway! =) So where to begin? I would like to share a couple of dating stories from my past to begin with, just to give an idea of my "luck" with the opposite sex.

I broke up with my boyfriend Chris 4 years ago (who btw most likely is gay) Let's just say he's a 34 year old virgin. I sure know how to pick em.' After a couple of weeks I decided to go on my first date since I have been single. We talked on the phone he said that I sounded so cute, so that won me over a little. Anyways, he seemed nice enough and the date turned out to be heading in a good direction. We went to for drinks at Gloria's and had some margaritas - and then decided to go to a wine bar when things took a turn for the worse. You say wine bar AFTER tequila. Yah, that's right. Well, this was before smart little Stacy learned that you can NOT mix tequila and wine. So we walk out to my car... and guess what folks? I throw up outside. Yes. oh yes. So then I get back in the passenger seat just to keep the world from spinning, the dude starts trying to make out with me. Um... can you say gross? To top matters off, while I think nibbling someone's lips from time to time can be sexy, he literally BIT my lips. Chomped down on those suckers Some of you might have heard of my "biter" date story. This is it. So he drives me to a gas station try to run to the bathroom and I throw up again on the floor. Lovely. I decide to call it a night... but when I wake up the next morning, my lips are swollen from the BITER. The biter will live on forever lol